Motherhood made me forgot about balance and start asking this question.
I gave up on finding balance shortly after KinderBae was born.
Finding Balance… What is that, anyway?
Motherhood taught me to fully embrace and appreciate the fluidity of the Universe. Nothing went according to my plans from the very beginning with my now 7 year old and future 2nd Grader.
For example… He was born almost 2 weeks post-due date, delivered via emergency c-section, and had a week stay in NICU. That was just the first month of his life.
Talk about loss of control!
By the time I had ToddlerBae, I was still resistance to the ebbs and flows of the Universe. But I learned to accept that God knew better than me.
I accepted that balance in the sense of full equilibrium is and was a mythical creature.
Balance came from learning acceptance or releasing the illusion of control. The balance came from allowing myself unconditional self-love and allotting the same multitude of grace for others to myself.
Late last week, I asked myself “what do you need?” Without hesitation my spirit said a week.
My Ex-Husband already had the kids for the weekend and I informed him that I’d be taking a mental health week. I was scared. Post-divorce our communication isn’t the best to say the very least.
I also felt a little guilty, but instead of practicing self-judgement; I honored my spirit.
It was difficult. But I felt a weight lifted. Thankfully, the Ex was considerate enough to honor my request as well.
I’m so big on self-care that the same question I asked myself I pose to you.
What do you need?
Honor the first response. Don’t judge it. Don’t ignore or deny yourself. If you can’t do it today, make a plan to give you what you need.
If you’re open to sharing, add your response to the comments
~Tamara
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I need to thank you for sharing your amazing journey!!! Your children are beautiful. Prayerfully, the communication in your family will get to where you are both comfortable with it. It can be beautiful and does not have to be adversarial.
Thank you so much for sharing your amazing story. I think it is so brave to ask for what you need. Self-care is very important. Right now I struggle to help someone see potential that they can’t see in themselves. I wonder if it’s time to let this relationship go or do I keep trying. I don’t know if I am being impatient with God waiting on an answer. Maybe I need to accept that I’ve done all I can do.