The Green Monster

December 11, 2008 By 16 Comments

aa woman jealous 300x221 The Green Monster

Photo Credit: Essence.com

Its funny to me how your confidence can bring out the ugly ‘Green Monster’ in the insecure. Let me give you an example.

One Friday I decide to ‘fro out’ for work. So one of my co worker’s response was something like “what’s WRONG with your hair?”. I really didn’t think anything of it because its a typical response. I just said “I’m natural!” sarcastically. Everyone else loved my hair. I think its the confidence I exude when fro-ed out that’s attractive.

This is the same girl who said “I can’t go natural”. “It looks good on you and you do so much with it.”

You don’t realize how much your confidence can bring out others insecurity.

If you are confidence enough to wear your natural, understand that’s a gift in itself.

Has this ever happen to you? How  do you deal with negative comments about your natural hair?

Filed Under: Hairspiration

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Comments

  1. Skylark says:
    January 1, 2009 at 11:30 pm
    Oh MY GOD!!! The same exact thing happened to me. This chick at my work is always saying something about my hair-when (mind you) everyone else is always like “wow, your hair looks great”, or “I love your natural hair”, etc etc. So I said to her “It seems strange that you always find a need to comment on my hair. Is it because you secretly want me to give you tip?” She walked away without saying a word. She gets on my last nerve. LOL LOL LOL
    Reply
  2. Natural Hair Rules!!! says:
    January 2, 2009 at 4:24 am
    Skylark826,That’s funny! I think I’m so use to it that I usually ignore it but this particular person was getting on my nerves. I wanted to go off on her and that mess on her head but I knew it was because she had low esteem. But that was a great come back. I know that shut her up.
    Reply
    • Michelle says:
      March 30, 2012 at 10:09 am
      Yes!!!!! That was an awesome comeback! She knows she’s a natural hair lover but she’s scared to admit it!
      Reply
  3. Beautifully.Conjured.Up says:
    January 9, 2009 at 9:27 pm
    I get this also on my job (I’ve written about it in some posts), and sad to say, it’s from a black woman…why hate the self so much?! Yet, she has about as much hair as a finger snap.
    Reply
  4. Anonymous says:
    May 3, 2010 at 11:11 pm
    You know, at first I thought I was trippin, because when I first started wearing my hair natural back in 2002, I wore it mostly in a Afro with different scarves, then I had this one chick secretly try to play me by saying, “Why don’t you wear your hair in different styles”, I basically had to cut her off because I realized that she was so insecure about her own hair. Every-other day she have a new home made weave style that basically made her look crazy half the time. I could not help it that I kept my hair looking nice and neat (At the time I was going to a barber to get my Fro trimmed) then the Fella’s was hitting on me more, that made her very upset. But I say hey don’t hate the Player, Hate the Game!!
    Reply
  5. TMonea says:
    May 3, 2010 at 11:20 pm
    I think all of us who no longer (or never have) live the “lye” have experienced this. I also have a co-worker who consistently has some negative comment or look regarding my natural tresses. I find it quite hilarious though and amid her negativity, she got “afro hair” sewn in…like, really?! You’re paying for a artificial version the very style that “looks a mess” on me?

    Not my issue…I’ll let you keep that one!

    Reply
  6. tanika says:
    May 4, 2010 at 2:19 am
    I swear I know someone who hardly talks to me when I wear my magic fro… but I love it because she always seems to be in the perfect spot where she can witness the compliments!!! I guess every natural must have this person in their lives
    Reply
  7. rick says:
    September 6, 2011 at 11:15 am
    it was a bit different with me but from the same boat …my boyfriends mother keeps asking me why i don’t ‘do’ my hair and i believe in ‘do’ she means , why don’t i get a weave,wig or braids….she makes me feel that i look like a mess ….but maybe she just doesn’t understand the way of natural hair,as she has always worn wigs or braids….hopefully she will like my natural hair soon and stop asking the same rude question….(anyways i love my fro and will never go back to relaxers ! :) )
    Reply
  8. Mylezmom says:
    September 6, 2011 at 11:34 am
    I’ve been natural for about 7 years and I get so many more complements when I wear my hair pressed out….when it’s in it’s “natural state” Not so much. People feel like straight hair is “pretty hair” but when I got here my hair was curly and we should be able to wear it how it is when we get up in the AM and not be looked at crazy…….society makes it exceptionally hard on a “natural” girl like we’re not good or pretty enough….In fact on the radio this AM I heard Steve Harvey talking negatively about natural hair women w/out makeup….that was very offensive to me as a natural woman…I have no fake nails or eye lashes and very rarely wear makeup…..can’t a natural girl be pretty NATURALLY?
    Reply
  9. 61n Heels says:
    September 6, 2011 at 6:23 pm
    @Mylezmom…heard the same comment from Steve Harvey this morning as well. His ignorant behind thought that natural was getting up in the morning and not doing a thing to your hair whether or not it was matted, dry, uncombed…etc…just ignorant….His cohost had to remind him that natural hair isn’t just a matted fro….but chemical free as well. Dummy

    I’m a natural newbie and last week I wore my hair in a curly fro for the very first time and noticed that folks didn’t want to say a WORD about it…..before going natural I was known for switching my hairstyles on a regular basis, and I get compliments each and every time I change styles…but OH NO, not when I wore the curly fro. Why is that? I’m still trying to figure it out. It’s pretty sad.

    Reply
    • Island_Girl says:
      September 6, 2011 at 9:27 pm
      61n Heels…continue being natural, there is a beauty from inside out when you’re living your life naturally. There are so many people that would LOVE to be natural they just dont want to take that risk. I wasn’t getting too many compliments when I first started. Now I get compliments even from men ….
      Reply
  10. don't hate me because i'm natural says:
    September 6, 2011 at 8:11 pm
    My mother would love to be natural, but she let others influence her. I love being natural I never worry about a bad hair day, because lets face it – natural hair does what it wants to do. There is so much freedom in being natural. A lot of times when people make comments, it due to their ignorance or insecurity..
    Reply
  11. geneva says:
    September 6, 2011 at 8:20 pm
    wow i have been natural only 1/12 months. with a little perm left in the top. I normally always wear my hair short. now that i have this short natural kjnda curly i fro i rarely ever get any compliments on my hair like i do when its permed and short and sassy . Im getting a little frustrated with it to the point i dont like the way i look but i dont really want to perm it but i may break down and do so. I really dont want to cut it down shorter than it is now. I DONT KNOW WHAT TO DO im in this in btween stage trying to transition.
    Reply
  12. Island_Girl says:
    September 6, 2011 at 9:22 pm
    Hey Geneva…I understand your frustration, what I would suggest you do is to braid your hair with extensions so you can completely remove the perm. Once the perm is completely out you can try kinky twist. I was in the same boat when I first started, 10 years later I am so HAPPY I didn’t turn back to perm.
    Reply
  13. DawnieUK says:
    September 7, 2011 at 3:01 am
    I live in the UK and the move twds natural hair for black women is still fairly new. Having said that, the general reception that I have experienced from my black sisters has been mainly positive. Our history here is slightly different in that many 1st generation Black
    British are between the ages of 40 -50 and our parents are mainly from the West Indies where back in the 40′s, 50′s they did not usually perm their hair, so lots of us had natural hair for a long while… Sometimes into our teens. So going natural is just re-visiting, with a lot more knowledge, our younger years – and as we ‘rock” it well, it’s usually appreciated in the same way.
    Reply
  14. Sonia Blades says:
    April 5, 2013 at 8:12 pm
    Well I guess its a little different for me but kinda The same thing. I did my big chop last March but I’ve only started growing my hair out since October. Now I realise that everone keeps asking me ” so what are u gonna DO with your hair now?” and I’m like ~eyes rolling~ ” Its already DONE”
    Reply

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